We cover information about developing a flexible mindset instead of a rigid approach to blogging, having compassion for yourself in the face of life’s challenges and why you should keep your wins top of mind.

Listen on the player in this post or on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, YouTube or your favorite podcast player. Or scroll down to read a full transcript.

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Guest Details

Connect with The Matbakh
Website | Instagram | Pinterest

The Matbakh is a Mediterranean food blog blending culture and good food. I’m a mom, engineer, psychology grad student, and food blogger. The Matbakh started as a passion project and has since grown into a monetized food blog.

Takeaways

  • Focus on progress, not perfection: Focus on gradual improvements rather than getting stuck in perfectionism.
  • Build habits for success: Create consistent habits like publishing frequently to grow your blog steadily over time.   
  • Celebrate small wins: Appreciate comments or minor improvements to keep yourself motivated through challenges.
  • Manage overwhelm with gratitude: Get through busy periods by focusing on what your thankful for in your business.
  • Overcome self-doubt with action: Start publishing to move past your initial fears instead of waiting for perfection.
  • Prioritize self-care: Making time for yourself through exercise or meditation to help you show up better for your blog work.  
  • Keep perspective on setbacks: Fluctuations are normal parts of the nonlinear entrepreneurial journey rather than failures.

Resources Mentioned

Headspace Meditation

Megan’s Recommended Books (see Mindset category)

Transcript

Click for full script.

EBT551 – Lilian Boukheir

Intro 00:00

Food bloggers. Hi, how are you today? Thank you so much for tuning in to the Eat Blog Talk podcast. This is the place for food bloggers to get information and inspiration to accelerate your blog’s growth, and ultimately help you to achieve your freedom. Whether that’s financial, personal, or professional. I’m Megan Porta. I have been a food blogger for 13 years, so I understand how isolating food blogging can be. I’m on a mission to motivate, inspire, and most importantly, let each and every food blogger, including you, know that you are heard and supported.

Megan Porta  00:37

You all know I’m kind of like a broken record when it comes to the topic of mindset. I talked about this all the time. I think mindset is the foundation for creating a solid, sustainable, successful food blogging business. So I absolutely loved that Lilian Boukheir brought this very topic to the table in this episode. Lilian is the food blogger over at The Matbakh, and she talks about so many great things that support that concept that mindset equals success in a business like ours. We cover so many great things including just getting into a rhythm, building habits that are going to serve you focusing on your progress and not being perfect because that will never happen. Focusing on your wins even if they’re really small and how powerful that simple practice can be so much other good stuff. You’re gonna love it. Please listen mindset is so important. This is episode number 551 sponsored by RankIQ. 

Sponsor  01:42

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Megan Porta  03:13

The Matbakh is a Mediterranean food blog blending culture and good food. I’m a mom, engineer, psychology grad student, and food blogger. The Matbakh started as a passion project and has since grown into a monetized food blog. Lilian, hello, welcome to the podcast. How is it going today?

Lilian Boukheir  03:32

It’s going great. I’m so happy to be here.

Megan Porta  03:35

So happy to have you here. This is one of my favorite topics. I love talking about mindset and how important it is. Oh my gosh, without it. I don’t know where I would be. Yes. First though, do you have a fun fact to share with us?

Lilian Boukheir  03:48

I do. So I am still able to walk on my hands. So all all those years of gymnastics, nothing stuck but the ability to walk on my hands and I can still do it at the age of 38.

Megan Porta  04:03

Oh my gosh. And do you do this often? Is this a party trick?

Lilian Boukheir  04:08

I do. I do right now I’m pregnant. So I 

Megan Porta  04:11

Probably not now. Yeah. 

Lilian Boukheir  04:13

Stayed off my hands. But um, yes, I pull it out here and again so…

Megan Porta  04:18

That’s so funny. I love it. I love all see this is why I do these because we learn things that you would never this would never come up in our in a conversation about mindset, right? So right now we’re all gonna imagine you walking on your hands. So great. Well, thank you for joining me here today. We are going to talk about mindset and how you really need to tap into this in order to find that success that you were looking for. Would you mind framing this conversation just by telling us a little bit about your blog?

Lilian Boukheir  04:49

Absolutely. So my first career I’m going to call it my first career was was more conventional and more of a traditional career. I went school and got an undergraduate degree in mechanical engineering. And I worked as an engineer for 10 years in the oil and gas industry. And once I had my first daughter, Amina, I stayed home with her. And I loved being at home. But it was really hard for me to envision going back to kind of like the more corporate dynamics. And so I was searching for, you know, some, some kind of creative outlet, something that I enjoy doing to kind of fill my time, and maybe turn into something a little bit more. And so I like to cook off of other food blogs, I really enjoy my time in the kitchen. And so the idea kind of came about, about four or five years ago, just well, you know, why don’t I just make my own food blog? My background is kind of diverse. And my my father’s Lebanese, my mom’s American. So we, we have a lot of different dishes running through our household growing up, and yeah, so it just kind of was one of those thoughts of like, well, why not? Let me let me just see where this goes.

Megan Porta  06:15

Absolutely. I love that. And then so that was like four to five years ago, when you had the idea. At what point did it become like a business for you I guess? 

Lilian Boukheir  06:24

I guess it became more of a business once I prior to monetization, this is just my personal opinion, I think you have to treat it like a business in order for it to become a business. So it wasn’t something that I just kind of fell into. So I would say the first year, I don’t think I really did anything, I was just kind of spinning around, not sure. You know where to begin. And then right about that year mark, I just set some goals of okay, I’m going to publish. And I think at that time, it was like two to three recipes a week. And I’m just going to get my hands dirty. And I’m just going to you know, learn as I go. And I think once I tied actions to, you know, kind of like, I had some goals, but once I tied actions to it, it started to become it started to come into fruition. 

Megan Porta  07:20

Yeah. And the actions are huge, right? Like, you can plan all day. But if you don’t act on it, then really like it’s that spinning wheel syndrome that you kind of alluded to. Yeah, so like one year in, you just really decided like, okay, the set, I’m gonna start doing the things. Did you see right away that mindset played a role in finding success? Because there’s so much going on? Or how did you land on that idea that you needed to focus on mindset? 

Lilian Boukheir  07:45

Absolutely. I feel like mindset, for me, at least is like, been a huge part of staying motivated. And just organizing myself to taking action. Whenever you’re kind of like a one person shop. If things don’t get done, they they don’t get done. You know, it’s not like you can kind of blame somebody else or rely on someone else. And so, in a sense, I realized early on, it was like a very hard reflection of, you know, where the blog went was directly correlated to my efforts and my ability to organize myself and stay motivated.

Megan Porta  08:24

Yeah, I love how you said that your success is directly correlated to your efforts and your actions. I think a lot of people don’t see that correlation for a while myself included for many years, I didn’t make the connection. And then when I did, I was like, Oh, I’m kind of like, it’s kind of fall falling on me. I’ve got to do this and figure it out. And that requires a lot of mindset work, usually. 

Lilian Boukheir  08:50

Absolutely. And I think what we don’t realize sometimes is like, it feels like a lot of effort to think about it, and it is. But when you think about things and don’t actually, like turn that into something actionable. It it’s like you’re spinning your wheels and not going anywhere. Sometimes when I’m when I find myself just thinking about like, oh, I need to do this. Oh, and it’s like, okay, instead of thinking what is the one thing I can do right now. So, you know, it’s in a lot of ways, it just feels almost the same amount of effort from thinking to actually doing it.

Megan Porta  09:29

It’s almost like the thought is your trigger. Like, okay, I’m having the thought. And now I know I need to act something like that. Yes. Yeah. That’s huge. Okay, so you had that realization, like, I need to act. I’m the boss, I need to treat this like a business. What else did you do to kind of get your mindset in check? 

Lilian Boukheir  09:50

So I had a lot of things happen over the past four years that have, you know, like, you know, life gets lifey 

Megan Porta  10:00

Yeah, yeah.

Lilian Boukheir  10:03

And so I found myself, you know, being unable to work on the blog consistently, you know, for chunks of time, just because I’m a mom, I was also pursuing a graduate degree, I moved countries, it was just the result, it was just a lot. And, and so where I saw my mindset really play a play a big role was me not getting discouraged whenever life got lifey. Because, you know, in a perfect world, right, when we, when we build our blogs, or our businesses, we would love it if it was linear, and it was just on the up and up. But sometimes life gets in the way, whether that’s an illness, or you know, a loss or a divorce or a child. And so I think just being able to step back, and and look at your wins and be like, okay, you know, yeah, it hasn’t been a straight trajectory. But But look at where I am now, versus where I started. And there’s growth here. It’s just, it’s more of a cha cha, it’s more of a dance and less of a, like, a sprint.

Megan Porta  11:17

Yeah, that’s an interesting perspective. It is so true. But when we think of like, an entrepreneurial journey, we think of a linear timeline, I think, right? Yeah, that’s, that’s where people go initially, but that’s not what it is. I mean, maybe for one person, and then existence, it’s been like that. But it is a dance that that’s such a great, we great way to put it, it’s like, it’s so hard to put words to the journey that we experience.

Lilian Boukheir  11:47

Yeah, I mean, in a lot of ways, I agree with everything, you’ve just said a lot of ways, it’s if you expect that it will be linear, then you will see any sort of movement backwards as a failure. And that’s the opposite of encouraging. It’s like, oh, man, it’s not working. And, you know, like with Google updates, and just with, you know, all the changes in this fast paced arena, you can easily or Pinterest, you know, like you can easily like things are winning, and then things aren’t winning, and you’re like, Oh, no. And so just being able to frame those instances in a way that isn’t discouraging, I found to be very helpful for myself, so that I can just say, okay, like, I’m just gonna learn from this, and I’m just gonna, you know, keep moving forward. 

Megan Porta  12:39

Yeah. And I find that being discouraged does pop up, even for me, like doing this so many years. I still find discouragement. But I feel like focusing on my mindset, and really, digging into that aspect of me makes that discouragement go away faster. Does that make sense? Like it doesn’t last as long at the shelf life is much shorter, totally. And I think that’s where the key is, like, you’re probably going to be discouraged from time to time with all the stuff going on right now, in our industry, you’d have to be a saint not to be ever discouraged. I feel like there’s so much but you can be discouraged less by doing what you said, like focusing on the wins, we all have wins to focus on, we can all look at some aspect of our business and say that we made progress in some area, and probably many areas, I think, right? 

Lilian Boukheir  13:31

Yes. You know, sometimes, I don’t know if, if this affects others, like it does me Facebook groups are awesome to like, you know, kind of stay up to speed with things, but sometimes, you know, you get in comparison mode. And so I found myself having to step back, like if I see someone like oh, well, I, you know, I made it to a premium ad network in like, less than a year or and those are great, those are solid wins. And I don’t have like the mindset that there’s a scarcity mindset where it’s like, you know, there’s only enough for so many I think that, you know, there’s there’s enough for all of us and for us to all kind of build each other up and grow. But sometimes you get in that competitive mindset where you’re like, Okay, so what am I doing wrong? Why isn’t it going fast enough? And I think when I when I catch myself doing that, I usually take a step back, and I’m like, okay, yes, things could be better. But they could also be worse. Look at look at the wins that I’ve had up until now. Like I didn’t make it in a year. But I made, you know, the premium ad network. You know, I think it took me two years to make it to an ad network and Okay, look at some of the things that I’ve learned along the way. So I learned how to write good content. And I take better photos than when I first started out.

Megan Porta  14:54

Yeah, there are different ways to measure it. So it’s not just like, where’s your traffic but it can be just what you said, like measure your progress in photography or video or the way you’ve approached your users or communicate with them, it can be so many different ways to measure. Yes, how you’re improving? Yeah, I love all of this. I think this is such an important topic that tends to get shoved under the rug, because of all of the things that are like in our face. Like, oh, this happened with SEO, you need to figure that out? And what about Pinterest? And we’re like, stop pushing mindset down my throat, because I need to figure out SEO, but it’s actually the opposite. You got to figure out your mindset. And then everything else falls into place so much easier, because we’re not as discouraged as often and all of that, right? 

Lilian Boukheir  15:48

Yes. It’s I mean, our our thoughts really control a lot of our, our behaviors. And so, you know, if we find that, that we’re not, you know, hitting goals, or moving in a direction we want to looking at that, I think is helpful, just just to kind of, you know, evaluate.

Megan Porta  16:08

Yeah, absolutely. always evaluating. So do you have some specific tips for us to just kind of hone in on this a little bit better, so that we have a really solid foundation for being a food blogger?

Lilian Boukheir  16:21

Yeah, I would say one of my biggest tips for myself, and I’m not sure if this resonates with others, but I am a person of habit, like the book, Atomic Habits really suited me. And I find that whenever I create, like a habit or a system, it’s easier for me, it’s just like, second nature. So what was really helpful for me is just like good getting into a rhythm of consistent publishing with, like, whenever I found my blog, to grow consistently, when it’s tied to my actions, it’s based on consistent output. And so what that might look like is, okay, I’m going to consistently publish, you know, one new post a week or two, whatever that may may look like. And I’m going to keep doing that, you know, and let’s say that if I can’t reach that, then let’s see what I can do. So maybe that’s just updating posts. So for me, it’s been designating days in which I work on my blog, and then tying, kind of like little work scopes to what I would expect for myself to, to accomplish. Yeah,

Megan Porta  17:35

I was gonna say, since you mentioned atomic habits, I have to say this. So he always says, like, what would what can you do on your worst day or your worst week? And, like, just do that, like, plan for that? Worst case scenario, but then if you can do more awesome, right? Yeah, getting into the rhythm, like you said, of just doing that thing, whatever you establish consistently is, is so huge.

Lilian Boukheir  18:00

Yeah. And I mean, we’re not robots, you know, like, it would be, you know, for us to not take, I have a blogger, friend, we were just talking and, you know, they decided to take several weeks off, I have taken sometimes months at a time off from my blog, just for personal reasons, reasons and family in being able to be okay with that, you know, like, we’re not we, we’ve got lives, we’ve got other things going on, and just saying, okay, you know, I’m going to do what I can during this period, but whenever I do need to take that chunk of time off, I’m going to take it off, and I’m not going to, you know, turn it into were like, Oh, I’m never going to come back to it. It’s just like, here’s this period of time, and we’re going to step away for a little bit, take a little vacation, some family time. 

Megan Porta  18:48

It’s so important to do that and to give ourselves and others permission to take that time off once in a while we cannot realistically carry on with a blog at the pace, we go, and we’re at our full pace. All the time, we will burn out we will not make it we will not survive in this world. So I love that you’re giving people permission to just step away for a time. Think that’s huge. 

Lilian Boukheir  19:14

Yeah. And I think a lot of times we go into blogging, or at least I did, because I wanted flexibility. You know, I wanted a life that I could, you know, I could turn it up when I want to turn it down when I need to, you know, like summers are really busy. And so not being able to allow myself to do that is kind of going against why why wanted to work on my, you know, start a food blog in the first place.

Megan Porta  19:40

Right? Yeah, we get into a zone where we’re like, Wait a second. I started this for the freedom and flexibility and I’m just at my computer all the time. And it’s like a It’s counterproductive. Like we don’t need to be doing that. So I find myself in that position occasionally to it’s really hard because we love our businesses. This is a lot of us are, like in love with what we’ve produced and what we’ve created. Our blogs are our babies, I just, I know, like we can get really invested in them. So it’s, it’s easy for me to lose time and lose my sense of like, oh, I need to be doing this with my family or whatever, like, I still have that struggle. It’s a real struggle. But we do need to remind ourselves that the freedom to be with our families or fill in the blank is why we most of us did this in the first place. Yep. How do you deal with like, I don’t know, for me, I have these seasons of overwhelm where it’s just like, everything piled up at once. It’s not necessarily Q4 For me, but I do have like, two times a year that I can think of that I just feel like, oh, my gosh, there’s so much crashing down so much that I’m trying to juggle. How do you deal with those seasons?

Lilian Boukheir  20:57

That’s a great question. I do feel overwhelmed often, possibly, because it’s like, you can, there’s really, it’s an it’s an open ended. It’s like, whatever you can produce, like, there’s an unlimited number of recipes, there’s an unlimited number of recipes to, to try out and perfect and whatnot. But how I handle those moments is I get a hacky, like, I’m just a broken record, I go back and I try to celebrate my wins, then just get in a place of gratitude. You know, I was reflecting on this the other day. So my blog is, it’s still a little bit smaller, but it’s been able to provide a really stable, at least for since it’s been monetized. And nice little part time, passive, you know, income stream, so its growth is dependent on how much I’m able to put into it. But whenever I’m busy with life and stuff, it’s still generating income. And so I was thinking the other day, you know, even though I feel like I’m not, it’s not growing as fast as I, as I want, or I’m not putting the amount of time into it, like I need to, or I’m overwhelmed with all the other things going on. I try to celebrate those parts of it, where it’s like, okay, I, I really love the flow when I create this content, like I love what I do. And I really like that when I don’t work on it, I still have a really nice income stream, I really liked that I can you know, grow it in the direction that I that I want to go in, you know, it really authentically represents who I am and the foods that I make at home. So I try to focus on those parts to balance the overwhelm or feeling like you know, I’m I’m behind or it’s not growing fast enough or my traffic stalling or I try to have that holistic perspective.

Megan Porta  23:00

I love that. 

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Megan Porta  24:35

The good thing about food blogs is that once you are monetized on an ad network, it is kind of passive so you can stop yourself like you said Lillian and just give yourself permission to set it down for a period. Because you don’t need to burn yourself out. You can set it down, let it percolate, let it earn some revenue, and hop back in when you’re feeling ready. So that’s the answer I just gave myself the answer. Thank you. I do struggle with that though. It’s like after so many years of doing this, I wonder why am I here? Again, I’m at the season where I’m so just I don’t know, overwhelmed. And I should know how to handle this by now and I’m getting better. But it’s a constant struggle for me. 

Lilian Boukheir  25:20

Oh, it’s a struggle for me too.

Megan Porta  25:22

Yeah. Well, I’m glad to hear I don’t I’m not glad that it’s a struggle. But I’m glad to hear I’m not alone in that. I think it’s probably a common theme for a lot of food bloggers. I would imagine. All right, what else do we have for mindset? I’m trying to think of other things. Oh, what about perfectionist tendencies, I know, that plagues a lot of us.

Lilian Boukheir  25:41

Oh, I I’m a recovering perfectionist. Yes, I do have to check in with myself and look at, you know, kind of zoom in into the progress. And not just like, in this idealistic, perfectionist mindset of everything needing to be perfect. I remember when I first started blogging, doing a recipe, and I think that’s why I sat on the blog for a whole year is because it wasn’t perfect. You know, it was like, I wanted the recipe to be so perfect, and the pictures to be perfect. And I was so afraid to just publish anything. And so and how I and I, like I mentioned, it was like a year of just like, you know, feeling kind of like as if, you know, I didn’t belong, I had all these feelings of like, Oh, I’m, I’m an imposter. And I don’t know what I’m doing. And people will know, and what if they don’t like my food? You know, it’s just like, all these things. And I guess what I ended up, you know, kind of, to overcome that was I’m just going to do it. Just gonna be okay, that somebody’s there’s gonna be somebody out there that that doesn’t like onions. Like I cook a lot with onions. And like onions, and it’s okay that they don’t like this dish, because they don’t like onions, or they don’t like garlic. 

Megan Porta  27:03

Who doesn’t like onions and garlic. Oh my goodness. Just kidding. But kind of not. 

Lilian Boukheir  27:08

Yeah, like every Lebanese dish has, like, very potent garlic, onions.

Megan Porta  27:14

I love it. They’re the best. 

Lilian Boukheir  27:16

Yeah, I just had to, you know, kind of overcome that. And so when I find myself getting stuck, you know, I kind of like when I’m having those similar thoughts that loop. Yeah, I try to break free from that by looking at, okay, let’s pull up. Like, if I feel as though my, my photography is still not where I want it to be. I pull up old photos. I’m like, alright, let’s be objective about this. This is where I started. And you can see a huge improvement once I learned how to use a DSLR. And then, you know, a gradual, incremental improvements as time went on, and there’s progress there. And so I’m like, Okay, I’m gonna celebrating this progress. And I’m just gonna keep at it and try to hone that skill. 

Megan Porta  28:04

Do you have said this a few times. And I think it’s so important that really a lot of the overwhelm and frustration that we can encounter as entrepreneurs can be solved with minute bits of gratitude, and celebrating wins. I mean, it sounds so simplistic, doesn’t it? But it is so true. Try it. It sounds like you’re an expert at it, Lillian, which I love. Because like I said earlier about just this whole topic being shoved under the rug, this can get shoved under the rug, too, because it seems like that couldn’t possibly work. But it works. So well. If you can just stop yourself from getting into that loop of crazy and just like experimenting with it, just like you just said, looking at a photo or whatever, like something so simple that you’ve improved upon. And focusing on that and being grateful can totally take you out of any overwhelm that you’re feeling. 

Lilian Boukheir  28:59

I agree. 

Megan Porta  29:00

Yeah, I think that looks like the message of this whole thing is just stop. Just Just look around you and see what you’ve done. You’ve built a business, you’ve done so many amazing things you’ve got, who cares if your traffic is quote, low, it’s more than what you had when you started, like there’s so many ways that you can look at what you’ve created and be so proud.

Lilian Boukheir  29:21

100% agree with that. 

Megan Porta  29:22

Yeah, we just have to have a little bit of love for ourselves. Sometimes we’re so hard on ourselves, right? Do you see that too? 

Lilian Boukheir  29:30

Absolutely. Yeah, we can be sometimes our our hardest critic. Yeah,

Megan Porta  29:34

it is. It’s I would love to hear your thoughts on how to deal with that because that is a common theme in our area.

Lilian Boukheir  29:41

Yeah, I try not to attach too much to I mean, it’s like what you said earlier that totally resonated with me was the blog and a lot of ways is my is another baby. It’s like, you know, someone that you create and you identify with and you just you nurture it, but trying not to attach to much to it, because we’re, we’re more than I mean, I don’t want to say this kind of sounds bad, but it’s really how I feel. We’re more than just our blog, and our blog in a lot of ways reflect us, but it isn’t the only reflection of us, meaning, like, we’re just so much more multifaceted, you know, we have lives outside of our blog, we are, aren’t we existed before our blog, and we will exist after you know, and so just not attaching too much. Just, you know, appreciating it and loving it for what it is and fostering it. And, but at this, at the end of the day, you know, we have relationships outside of our blog and lives outside of our blog, and just trying to celebrate that too.

Megan Porta  30:45

How do you plan with, you know, just keeping mindset in mind and like staying in a healthy space there to find success? How do you plan, like content and anything without getting frustrated? Or like, caught up in all the things? Do you have tips for that? 

Lilian Boukheir  31:05

Yeah, so I am a recovering to do lister. And sometimes it’s helpful, like I get a big, I’ll get a white sheet, and I just take everything that’s on my mind and put it on the sheet, just to get it out of my mind. And then what I’ll do is I just pick, it’s really one thing, like, so I create my own journals, I do it in Canva. I use Canva for my Pinterest pins. And so I make my own like daily reflection journal. And part of that is gratitude. So every day, I go through a gratitude piece, and I try to touch on my blog, like something I’m thankful regarding my blog, like if I got a comment on a recipe, you know, that like somebody, I recently had one where was a gentleman his wife had, she was Moroccan and she had passed away, and she used to make really good couscous. And he was making couscous for a Islamic holiday Eid, and he used my recipe and he said that it tasted just like her couscous. And, you know, we just sometimes stopping to just appreciate something as simple as a comment like that. And so back to my little journal thing, I have a section that says, like, I let go, and sometimes it’s related to my blog, like I let go of my perfectionist mindset, or, or whatever, I’ve attached my expectations that I’ve attached to. And then I have a part of my blog, and I just put one thing, like, I don’t put like 10 things to do in that day. I just put one thing it’s like so today, I want to work on Pinterest pins. And so I just put, what I’m going to work on today is just Pinterest pins. And it might be as big as I’m gonna, I’m gonna create a new recipe. It could be that but all I had time to do today was Pinterest pins.

Megan Porta  32:56

Yeah. And that’s doable, right? Just putting those chunks that are doable and feasible down. And that doesn’t make you feel as crazed about planning your stuff. 

Lilian Boukheir  33:05

Yeah. And it feels good to cross it off and do something. Yeah.

Megan Porta  33:11

There’s nothing better than crossing things off the to do list, right? I love your brain dump thing, too. I do that once in a while where I just, like, there’s so much swimming in my head that I’ll just like, almost like vomit all over my notebook. Just put everything down that’s in my head that I need to do for the next three months or whatever it is. And that just somehow is cathartic. It feels so good to do that. Yeah, even if you can’t get it all done, realistically, it’s still good to get it out. Yeah, that’s like a, that should be a food blog therapy. Something like that really works. I don’t hear people talk about that enough. But I’m I’m glad that you do it too. Yes, yes. What else we need to know with mindset, what else has worked for you, or anything that we should keep in our heads as we navigate the rest of this year?

Lilian Boukheir  33:57

I feel like being a food blogger. Like I remember when I put my website up and like, my, the only visitor was like my mom and my sister, like, and I thought that was a when I was they can access a website that I put up. And, you know, so where I was going with that was, you know, just kind of keeping things in perspective. And just when you find yourself having it’s a feeling it’s like this stuck feeling or an overwhelmed feeling. Just trying to detach from it, zoom out a little bit and you know, like, think think a little bit about you know, is this really, you know, if it’s keeping you up at night, is this worthy of keeping me up at night. I recognize these feelings but I’m also going to just kind of put them in their little bubble over here and you know, not attached too much to it. 

Megan Porta  34:50

And that’s that can be hard but with practice I think that can get easier right? 

Lilian Boukheir  34:55

Yeah, I think so.

Megan Porta  34:57

You know it’s helped me with that is meditation I have been just really diligent consistent with meditating recently, making it a priority for the first time in my life. I feel like I’m so much more prone to just letting things go like that. Whereas before, I would, in the middle of the night hold on to things that were ridiculous, like, what am I actually going to do about that project? Now? Nothing but yet I stay up for hours thinking about it. But now I feel like I can just go into this, like almost Zen state and talk myself into a better place. I am also sleeping better in general after meditating. Do you experiment with meditation at all?

Lilian Boukheir  35:38

I love that you brought that up. I used to have a meditation practice before I slept. And it was very, very helpful. I probably I need to get back into it. It’s so good. So I’ve done actually, too. I don’t know. Do you have headspace? Or you’ve heard of Headspace?

Megan Porta  35:55

I’ve heard of Headspace. Yeah, I’ve heard people love Headspace.

Lilian Boukheir  35:59

I’ve used them. And then I’ve also done Walking Meditations. Yes. But yes, I have seen a correlation in my ability to perceive the thoughts running through my head as separate from myself. Whenever I’m in a meditation practice.

Megan Porta  36:21

Yeah, that’s a really good way to put it. Yeah. Because when you’re not, or when, when you’re caught up in your thoughts, you can’t observe what’s going on. You’re just you’re there experiencing it, you’re frustrated, you’re overwhelmed, whatever. But when you went, when I am in a meditation practice, I can do exactly what you just said and kind of observe and go, Oh, wait, that’s something that I don’t need to think about. Or like, I can pull myself out of it somewhat more easily. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, there’s so much power there. But it’s hard. For me For the longest time, it was like, I don’t have time to sit down even for five minutes. And even when I do, I think through the whole meditation, there were all these excuses that I would come up with. But once you figure it out, and it’s not that hard to figure out, it’s magic can do so much for your mindset I think.

Lilian Boukheir  37:13

That’s a really good point. Yeah, I think even just stuffing like, and this is more just in life in general. But I used to feel guilty, like mom guilt, you know, when with like, taking time for myself, you know, like going to exercise, because there’s so many things. It’s like, oh, what I got to do the laundry, and I gotta make dinner. And I feel like I shifted in, in many areas of my life, once I started to realize, no, I really need to, I need to be in a good frame of mind, I need to be okay, while I’m moving through my day. And so, you know, when I care for myself, whether that be sleeping well, or taking time to meditate, or exercise, or journal, or whatever that might look like to you, because it’s different for everybody, I’m able to show up and a lot different way, then had I not done that. And I find working on my blog, it’s the same. So, you know, if I’m just like, only focused on my blog, and not taking care of the other aspects, and I’m staying up really late to get things done, or, you know, it doesn’t it’s not as enjoyable. It’s not something I’m, like, looking forward, it’s becoming more like stressful and, and so I think the way in which you show up to do the work on on our on your business, or on our businesses is also really important to think about so…

Megan Porta  38:40

yes, that is so true. I can relate to everything you just said as well. Yeah, this is a really important topic. Hopefully, we’ve inspired some people to just, you know, focus on mindset a little bit, whether it’s creating those habits or working on that perfectionistic mindset, or just having a little bit more love for yourself when you’re judging or being harsh with you. Or what we just talked about, like maybe getting into a meditation practice. Is there anything else, Lillian that you want to mention before we start saying goodbye?

Lilian Boukheir  39:11

No, I just think if you’re listening to this, yeah, give yourself a nice big hug.

Megan Porta  39:17

Oh, yes.

Lilian Boukheir  39:18

It’s not easy. And you know, it’s it’s a lot of fun, but you’ve probably made made a lot of progress and whatever you’re working on, and yeah,

Megan Porta  39:29

Yeah, I love it. That’s such a good way to end and thank you so much for bringing this topic to the table. I I just love it when other people feel as energized by it as I do. Because I feel like I’m a broken record sometimes constantly telling people you’ve got to work on your mindset. So thank you Lillian for also being an advocate for this very important topic. I appreciate you.

Lilian Boukheir  39:53

Absolutely.

Megan Porta  39:54

Do you have either a favorite quote or words of inspiration to leave us with?

Lilian Boukheir  39:57

I do. So this quote is by Shunryu Suzuki, okay. And it is, “If your mind is empty, it is always ready for anything. It is open to everything. In the beginner’s mind, there are many possibilities, but in the experts mind, there are few. So, I like this quote because it just reminds me that when I’m in a place of, of, like, you know, beginner’s mindset and just like wanting to absorb information, I’m able to, to look at things a little bit different than whenever I approach from like more of an expert, like, you know, like, Oh, I’ve already got that down. And just staying in that and being able to continue to learn and have that growth mindset.”

Megan Porta  40:44

Oh, I love that. That is the absolute perfect way to end this conversation. Thank you so much. We will put together a show notes page for you Lillian, if you want to go pick it those head to eatblogtalk.com/… Okay, I’m gonna let you say what comes after the forward slash because you say it better and you can spell it for people if you don’t mind to. 

Lilian Boukheir  41:05

Absolutely, it’s thematbakh. And it’s spelled t-h-e m-a-t-b-a-k-h and it’s an Arabic word that means kitchen. And so it’s it’s a combination of English and Arabic the kitchen. 

Megan Porta  41:23

Love it so people can find you there correct if they go to your website.

Lilian Boukheir  41:28

Yep, www.thematbakh.com

Megan Porta  41:32

And social media as well. Any other place you want to direct people? 

Lilian Boukheir  41:35

Nope. I have Pinterest, Instagram YouTube. And that’s pretty much where I’m at.

Megan Porta  41:42

All right, well, thank you and everyone go check out Lillian’s blog and her channels and thank you again so much Lillian for being here and thank you for listening and food bloggers. I will see you next time. 

Outro  41:56

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