Episode 658: 5 Quick Shifts for Instant Positivity (Mindset & Self-Care)

EBT658 – 5 Quick Shifts for Instant Positivity

Intro

Hey food bloggers. Thank you so much for joining me in this mindset and self-care focused episode here on Eat Blog Talk. One of the reasons I started a blog talk was to hold a space to talk about the importance of mindset and self-care. Being an entrepreneur can be a lot. If we are not taking care of ourselves, then getting actionable information about SEO Pinterest or whatever else is all moot. I will meet you back here every Wednesday to discuss various mindset and self-care topics. So you have the energy and space to tackle the rest.

[00:00:34]  Megan Porta 

Hello food Bloggers. Welcome to this self care and mindset focused episode of Eat Blog Talk. In today’s episode we are going to talk about five Quick shifts for Instant Positivity I don’t know about you, but I am always in the market for an instant positive shift in my mood.

[00:00:53]  Megan Porta 

Usually after my morning routine I am ready to go. I am feeling good, refreshed, positive and I’m ready to tackle just about anything that comes my way. On some days though, work and life and children and my to do list get the best of me and I can feel my heart start racing, my anxiety starts to increase, my breathing gets really shallow.

[00:01:20]  Megan Porta 

Sometimes I push through this, don’t do this and sometimes I just stop and I have a little conversation with myself about the importance of taking care of me. I love it when I’m able to actually do this. It feels really small, but it’s actually a huge win when I’m able to stop myself and make this happen.

[00:01:42]  Megan Porta 

This list that I’m sharing with you today is born of my desire to create positive shifts for myself on those difficult days. I hope there’s something here that you can pull out and use if you are having a tough day as well. I want you to know that you always have the power to shift your mindset and mood quickly whenever you want.

[00:02:02]  Megan Porta 

I know it’s not always easy, but you always have that power to do so. In this episode we will discuss five simple, actionable things you can do right now to boost your positivity and reframe your thinking.

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[00:02:50]  Megan Porta 

Number one, actually listen, this is something I have been trying to work on and to be super intentional about recently. Not only does truly listening to someone when they’re talking serve that person, it also serves us as listeners. A few weeks ago, my family and I were chatting with some people.

[00:03:16]  Megan Porta 

I noticed that every time Dan or I or our boys spoke, I could literally see these people preparing the replies. And the replies never actually had anything to do with what we had said. Instead of being frustrated or irritated with this, I was honestly just intrigued. I was curious to have a conversation that involves zero listening on one end is weird.

[00:03:41]  Megan Porta 

What is the point? We didn’t feel fulfilled or heard at the end of our time together and I can’t imagine that felt super rewarding on their end. I’m actually not sure. Maybe it was in a weird way, I don’t know. At any rate, it created this off balanced weirdness that left me wanting to invest more of my energy into actually listening to people.

[00:04:02]  Megan Porta 

I’ve always considered myself to be a fairly good listener. I think this has improved even more since starting this podcast because I have to listen here really closely, but there’s always room for improvement if I’m having a rough stretch. In my day, I’ve started experimenting with actually listening to the next person I speak to.

[00:04:24]  Megan Porta 

Like truly hearing what they’re saying and not formulating my next thought, but trying my absolute best to truly hear and understand what they are saying to me. I found that this totally snaps me out of any negativity that was lingering inside of me. It puts my focus on someone else and it makes the other person feel heard and feel good.

[00:04:46]  Megan Porta 

Listening involves being fully present and engaged, so when you listen with intention, you are actually grounding yourself in the present moment and you’re allowing positivity to flow in. It totally works. Taking the time to truly listen to someone helps to create emotional connection. It encourages empathy and it helps bring you to the present moment.

[00:05:08]  Megan Porta 

Like I’ve said, being present will help stop the cycle of negative thinking leading to a much more positive outlook. Here are a few actionable ideas for you. Pause before responding to someone Take a brief moment after somebody finishes speaking to make sure you are fully understanding what they’ve said before offering a reply back.

[00:05:30]  Megan Porta 

Put away distractions Set aside your phone or other devices during your conversations so you can give your full attention to the person speaking. Make eye contact and use body language. Show that you’re engaged by maintaining eye contact and using positive body language such as nodding or leaning in slightly. Repeat back what you’ve heard.

[00:05:50]  Megan Porta 

You can try summarizing what the other person has said to let them know you understand and to demonstrate that you are there and truly listening. Ask open ended questions. Encourage deeper conversation by asking questions that invite in more detailed responses such as oh, how did that make you feel? Listen without judging or interrupting.

[00:06:14]  Megan Porta 

Focus on really hearing the other person’s perspective without jumping to any conclusions or cutting them off mid sentence. I used to be really bad at this. I’ve gotten so much better. Practice active listening in small conversations, so start with everyday interactions by focusing fully on the other person, even if it’s a super casual conversation.

[00:06:33]  Megan Porta 

Just to build up your muscle with this. Set a goal to listen more today. So challenge yourself to actively listen more in your conversations today with your family, with your friends, with your neighbor, the mailman, aiming to give those people your full undivided attention. Number two Offer Undeserved Grace Confession this one has not always been easy for me.

[00:06:57]  Megan Porta 

It is something I’m not proud of. I’ve historically had this viewpoint that undeserved grace isn’t always good. I don’t know where this came from. I’m sure there’s some deep seated meaning behind this. I have been actively working on changing this because sometimes undeserved grace just feels so good to offer. Have you noticed that some people are really good at doling out grace while others are not as good at it?

[00:07:23]  Megan Porta 

There have been memorable times in my life that I remember intensely in the best way when others have given me grace that I did not deserve. There were times when I just did stupid or selfish crap to people and in return they offered me grace. I vividly remember thinking, wow, I did not deserve this, yet they gave it to me anyway.

[00:07:45]  Megan Porta 

You hear stories about police officers who have grace for really undeserving people who do terrible things and how they were able to completely turn their lives around because of that grace. I was tossing this idea around the other day when I was having a bit of a rough afternoon. I decided to try it out the next time I became frustrated with someone in my family.

[00:08:07]  Megan Porta 

Later that night, an opportunity came up for me to do this. My oldest kid, Elijah, lost my AirPods for the 93rd time this month. He always ends up finding them, which I guess means that he never actually loses them. But know what I’m saying? This usually results in me getting upset, frustrated, irritated, etc.

[00:08:28]  Megan Porta 

And setting boundaries that are likely delivered with a tone of frustration and irritation. This time though I showed grace and I said, it’s okay, they’re so small, they’re easy to lose. We will find them, which completely took him by surprise. He even said, really? Grace, especially when it’s not earned, can transform the way we approach challenging situations and people.

[00:08:57]  Megan Porta 

I have found that offering grace to others and to myself during tough times instantly lifts my mood and helps me stay grounded. Offer grace to yourself or to others so you can eliminate judgment and create a sense of peace, allowing you to move forward with less emotional baggage. Here are some actionable ideas.

[00:09:16]  Megan Porta 

Forgive yourself for small mistakes throughout the day. I know I have many of these throughout each day. Give yourself permission to make the mistakes and learn from them instead of carrying guilt with you or frustration throughout the day. Give someone else a pass when others make mistakes. Remind yourself that everyone is human.

[00:09:35]  Megan Porta 

Practice patience instead of holding on to judgment. Let go of unrealistic expectations both for yourself and others. Remember, recognize when you are holding yourself or others to impossible standards and release that pressure by embracing understanding. Celebrate progress, not perfection, both for you and others as well. Acknowledge and appreciate the small wins and progress rather than waiting for everything to be perfect before celebrating.

[00:10:04]  Megan Porta 

Number three Experience a Moment do you have days when you get to the point where you’re crawling into bed at night and you realize you didn’t stop to actually experience any part of your day? You just brute force autopiloted your way through the entire day? Yeah, me too. This never feels good. It is so easy to rush through life and not stop to experience those precious present moments that make up our days.

[00:10:34]  Megan Porta 

Even if it’s just once during the day for a few seconds, being fully present will change your perspective. This past weekend I was running through my to do list. I even have to do lists on the weekends. Just humming along checking everything off. Workout, laundry, get recipes started, run to post office, more laundry.

[00:10:52]  Megan Porta 

You know how it is. My awesome oldest kid appeared in front of me as I was walking up the stairs and he said mom, can we hang out? The very first thing that went through my head was I have stuff to do but I stopped before speaking and instead said yes. My 17 year old son was asking to spend time with me and I absolutely could not turn that down.

[00:11:16]  Megan Porta 

I put everything aside for a bit and I played Legos with Elijah followed by a show on Disney plus. This just felt right. It felt so good to experience that moment with him. It would have been super easy to say no to his invitation to put it off for later and who knows if it actually would have happened.

[00:11:35]  Megan Porta 

I don’t know if you do this, but I have a word that inspires me every year and that I carry with me as I move through the year. This year, the word that came to me is experience. I want to experience as many moments and as many experiences with as much presence and intention as possible.

[00:11:54]  Megan Porta 

This year I owe it to my word of the year for stopping and saying yes to Elijah’s request to spend quality time together. Being mindful of the moment and the people in each moment helps you reset and appreciate life as it is now, decreasing stress you might feel and filling you with gratitude.

[00:12:14]  Megan Porta 

Here are some actionable ideas for you. Take a pause and breathe once in a while when you feel overwhelmed, pause for a few seconds and just take a few deep breaths. Experiencing those moments doesn’t have to be about other people, it can be about you just experiencing what what is going on. Now focus on one task at a time.

[00:12:36]  Megan Porta 

So instead of multitasking, really immerse yourself fully in the task at hand. Whether it’s a conversation or a work project or a creative project. Enjoy a sensory experience. Take a moment to truly savor a cup of coffee or a meal or even the scent of flowers. I have been really trying to do this lately because I get into the habit of eating while I’m working or drinking my coffee while I’m doing something else.

[00:13:04]  Megan Porta 

I’ve been trying to separate each task so that I can truly savor it. Practice mindful walking. I don’t know if you’ve ever done this, but it’s so cool. Go outside when it’s nice and walk with your full attention to your surroundings. Don’t think about work. Don’t think about anything else that’s going on.

[00:13:23]  Megan Porta 

Just focus on what you’re seeing, what you’re hearing, what you’re smelling, what you’re observing in nature. Journal for just a few minutes. So write down your current thoughts, your feelings, helping you to really ground yourself in that moment. Engage fully in a conversation with somebody. Go talk to somebody. Give them your full attention.

[00:13:40]  Megan Porta 

Listen actively and be fully present, leaving any distractions behind and not thinking about what’s coming next. Share a moment of laughter with somebody else. Spend time with others doing something that brings you guys joy, like watching a funny video or reminiscing about a memory, and let the laughter flow and connect over a meal.

[00:14:02]  Megan Porta 

Take the time to enjoy a meal with your family or somebody else, focusing on the experience rather than rushing through it. Engage in that meaningful conversation and savor the moment together. Number four Lose the phone. Ah, the phone situation. You have heard me speak from my soapbox, probably more than you’d like on this topic.

[00:14:23]  Megan Porta 

It is a point of contention for me. I feel like most people don’t take the power we allow our phones to have over us seriously. Enough People are wandering around out there like mindless drones, looking down at their phones way too much, allowing these little devices to enslave them. I think in today’s time, it’s hard not to at least experience a stretch of obsession or addiction when it comes to our smartphones.

[00:14:51]  Megan Porta 

They’re so smart and they’re so irresistible, right? I won’t get into my story of my phone addiction obsession here, but it was a real issue for me a few years ago, and one day I made the decision to put an end to the madness. It was not easy, but it’s one of the best small steps I have ever decided to take in my life.

[00:15:13]  Megan Porta 

Now, today, I barely touch my phone. I rarely know where it is. If you text me and I don’t reply until the following day, it’s because I’ve been ignoring my phone, not you. I use my phone to play my morning workouts. I also use it to listen to podcasts and audiobooks, and I use it to post reels to Instagram and to text friends and family outside that.

[00:15:35]  Megan Porta 

I really don’t have any use for this device. I refuse to be one of those people standing in line at the post office or sitting in the waiting room at the doctor’s office who scrolls just because they’re bored. I’m the strange person in the waiting room who sits and stares at other people, or I pick up a magazine or gasp.

[00:15:54]  

I actually have a conversation with someone or one of my family members if they happen to be with me. So here’s my little soapbox message for today. Experiment with putting your phone down. I want to point out that I am not better than anyone else because of my feelings and my relationship with my phone.

[00:16:13]  Megan Porta 

I have gone through a long journey to get here, and I just really want to encourage others to consider something similar. You know that feeling when it feels icky when you’ve been on your phone too much, or when you’ve been on it and you have had no purpose to be on it? When you feel that ick, just put it away.

[00:16:32]  Megan Porta 

Taking this break, even if it’s really short, not only reduces distractions from your life and your day, but it also allows you to refocus on what is going on in the present moment, connecting you with the people and world around you. It offers an instant shift into a more positive mindset. Disconnecting from your phone will boost your mood, it’ll reduce feelings of anxiety, and it will help you to focus on what truly matters.

[00:16:58]  Megan Porta 

There are a zillion studies out there showing how bad it is for your soul to be a slave to your phone. Here are some actionable ideas. Schedule some phone free times if that helps. Set designated hours during the day to not look at your phone. So maybe during meals or before bed or until 9am or something like that.

[00:17:20]  Megan Porta 

Use the Do Not Disturb mode. Activate it when you need a break to focus on your priorities or engage in quality time with other people. Turn off all social media notifications. Reduce that temptation to check your phone every few minutes and just turn it all off. Take a digital detox. Try taking an entire day or weekend or week without your phone.

[00:17:43]  Megan Porta 

This feels really hard for a lot of people I know, but you never know. It might transform your life. And try keeping your phone out of reach. Place your phone in another room during meals or important tasks or conversations that you’re having or whatever. And number five, spend 10 minutes decluttering clutter can be such a huge source of stress, and it’s often something we’re not even aware of.

[00:18:09]  Megan Porta 

One of my Mastermind members in 2024 was telling the rest of us in our last Mastermind call of the year that she had recently decluttered her inbox and how much mental space this had opened up for her. Another member shared about cleaning out her bedroom closet and how this positively impacted her mood.

[00:18:28]  Megan Porta 

There’s so much power in the simple act of decluttering. Don’t underestimate this. This is actually a hack I tap into a lot when I’m needing a boost in positivity. Usually I default to decluttering something in my home, like a cluttered corner, a bookshelf, or my closet. This past weekend, I was starting to feel angsty.

[00:18:48]  Megan Porta 

I opened up my laptop to do my weekly planning and I noticed how disgustingly gross and dirty my laptop keyboard and screen were. It was disturbing. I took 10 minutes to really wipe everything down and get it spic and span clean. This did wonders for my mood. I couldn’t believe it. Not just my mood in that moment, but future moods.

[00:19:09]  Megan Porta 

Every time I’ve opened my laptop in the past few days, I literally gasp with excitement about how clean it looks. Take 10 minutes to declutter something, anything. This can have an immediate impact on your mindset, creating a calmer, more focused head and environment. Decluttering provides a sense of accomplishment and clarity now, allowing you to feel more in control and at peace with everything.

[00:19:33]  Megan Porta 

Here are a few actionable ideas. Clear off your desk. Spend 10 minutes clearing off your workspace to make it more organized and inviting. Tidy up your digital space. Sort through your email inbox. Delete old files and organize your desktop. Create a cluttering to do list to tap into when you need it. You could write down a few small areas to declutter each day.

[00:19:56]  Megan Porta 

Whether it’s your car, your closet, your office or something else. Focus on one drawer or shelf. Pick a super small manageable area to tidy up to avoid feeling overwhelmed. One drawer is doable and will take just a few minutes. Donate unused Items. Use the 10 Minute window to sort through things you no longer need and put them in your garage so you can take them out for donation next time you’re out and about.

[00:20:23]  Megan Porta 

That is all I have for you for today’s episode. We talked about five simple but powerful actions you can take to bring more positivity into your life. Now to recap one. Actually listen. Be present and engaged in your interactions today. 2. Offer undeserved grace. Be kind to yourself and others and embrace those mistakes.

[00:20:44]  Megan Porta 

Number three Experience a moment. Take the time to pause and appreciate the present moment. Number 4 lose the phone. Disconnect to reconnect with yourself. Number 5 spend 10 minutes decluttering. Clear your space to clear your mind. Remember that positivity does not have to be complicated, it does not have to be time consuming.

[00:21:03]  Megan Porta 

These small shifts can make a huge difference in your mindset and help you move through your day with more ease and joy and all that good stuff. Thank you so much for tuning in today. I will catch you in the next episode.

Outro 

Thank you so much for listening to this mindset and self-care episode here on Eat Blog Talk. If you are a food blogger providing a service for other food bloggers, and you want to spread the word about the value that you offer. I would love to offer you a free way to do just this. Send me a 60 second audio clip to be featured in a mindset and self-care episode here on Eat Blog Talk. Go to eatblogtalk.com/audioclip to learn more.